Always Wooing

When I first met my husband-to-be, it was love at first sight…

Of His Cowboy Boots.

I was sitting on the floor cross-legged, chatting about philosophy or music or giving up boys to focus on my career. Then Boots arrived. I stopped and admired those leather beauties before my gaze traveled upward to his handsome face.

I’m pretty sure all talking ceased, lightning crashed and the world stopped. Well… I may not be remembering it exactly - I think people were still talking.

From then on, Boots and I spent many precious moments together. Our friendship and hearts grew until the day he awakened at 4 AM to bake my favorite, chocolate-chip cookies, tucked a sparkly ring into his pocket, and went off to work. That night, with cookies and flowers, sweet words and a smile, he asked me to marry him.

Of course, I said, "YES!"

On our wedding day, his father told us that the secret to a long and happy marriage was to “Keep selling.” He was working in advertising, so to him "selling" meant "wooing."

My hubby and I took his advice to heart.

Fast forward 5 years into our marriage. Two jobs. Traveling for work. A mortgage. Bills. Dreams. But we made wooing each other a priority in our lives.

Boots wooed me in little ways and big. He made my favorite dinner. He surprised me with a stunning necklace from Switzerland.

I wooed him, too. I tucked love notes in his briefcase. I ran a marathon with him.

Fast forward 10 more years. Babies. Another mortgage. More bills. More work. But we found time to woo each other. I surprised him with vintage wine. He surprised me with an anniversary trip to Paris... and he took over diaper duty.

I adored him for both.

It’s funny. When I started writing this, I remembered all the big wooing. Jewelry. A horse. Just-the-two-of-us getaways. But our marriage also thrives on the little wooing. Like when Boots does the dishes, warms up my side of the bed, or draws me a bath when I’m cranky. Or when I rub his shoulders, text him what I love about him, or turn the swamp cooler to icy cold.

Little wooing, but essential.

The Happy Wives Club asked women for marriage advice that really works. Sharon Moskowitz summed it up perfectly. “Always continue to do what you did to get them.”

In other words, continue to WOO them!

And wooing doesn’t have to be extravagant. In this video from the Huffington Post, Jennifer Garner gives creative date night ideas for busy parents.

Today, Boots and I are blessed with two amazing children. We live in a dream community full of caring friends, loving animals, and mountain views that fill our soul. We are busier now than ever before, but we find little ways to woo. A longer hug. A love note. Flowers. A text why we are proud of each other. A picnic dinner in the park.

Some things take mere seconds while others take planning. But I never see it as another chore in my crazy, busy life. I see it as a joy! A challenge! A treat! I feel so lucky that I get to show my love and affection and heart to Boots by wooing him.

And the best part? The look on his face as he falls in love with me all over again.

This morning- twenty years after the first time- my hubby asked me again to marry him. There were no flowers or cookies. And it was on the phone across thousands of miles and time zones.

But it still wooed me. So, of course, I said, "YES!"

How do you WOO someone you love?

Suzanne BrownOctober 22, 2013